In Repair
by sofia333
Summary: "It takes me a moment to realize that the feeling is joy. Blissful. A happy, laughing feeling, bubbling up in my toes and spreading to my arms, making everything warm and tingle and vibrate. So I hug Tobias back, clutching at his neck and hair, too afraid to let go; scared this happiness will slip through my fingers, and I'll loose it, again, just like I did last time." *AU*
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I'm not Veronica Roth, therefore i do not own any of yhese characters or Divergent. I know, I'm sad too:(**

**BEATRICE**

"Beatrice."

"Mother."

"You need to get out."

"I know."

"Now."

I reluctantly lift my eyes from my fingers, which are tracing shapes in the fabric of the car seat. I stare at my mother, bags under heavy eyes, exhaustion written over her face. To be completely honest, I'm exhausted of myself, too.

"Okay." I say. My voice sounds small and scared now. Like a child's. I step out of the car, one leg at a time, and she closes the door for me. I snatch the sunglasses perched on the top of her head and put them on; the sun irks me. I instantly start to feel uncomfortable, my leggings and sweater not suitable for the 80 degree weather.

"I packed you shorts." My mother tells me, as we walk up the pathway, leading to the yellow house with flowers on the windowsills. It's not small, or big, which is nice I guess, because I don't like getting lost. She rings the doorbell.

"This will be good for you." She tries to smile at me, but ever since the incident happened, smiling has never been something she does regularly. It looks out of place on her.

I don't say anything. I don't know if this will be good for me. Staying with a family you don't know because your mother doesn't like you may be good. Or not.

Probably not.

The door opens, revealing a girl, around my age. She's taller than my mother, long legs the color of chocolate and short brown hair. Her lips are painted red, gold eyeshadow and dark eyeliner marking her eyes. She and my mother embrace.

"It's nice to see you again, Christina. You've gotten so big."

"Pleasure as always, Natalie." The girl, Christina, replies smoothly. She turns to me, grinning, showing me her slightly crooked teeth. She's still beautiful, the kind of beautiful that deserves to be noticed, even with all the makeup.

"Hi," she says, holding out her hand. For a moment, I think I'm going to take it, but I don't. She awkwardly drops her arm. "I'm Christina. Beatrice, right?"

"Mhmm." I sound small again. I used to always sound like this. Frightened, sad. Maybe I'm going to end up like that once more. Caleb told me not to think like that, so I focus on the tiles on the floor.

"Let me get my mom," Christina opens the door more widely. "Come in."

We do, my mother pulling my wrist. There's a living room to my left and a staircase to my right, a long hallway straight ahead. The otherwise blank walls are adorned with paintings, an array of colors smeared on canvases. A woman resembling Christina enters from the hallway, beaming.

"You're here!" She exclaims, wrapping an arm around both of us. I stand rigid until she lets go, not hurt by my lack of affection. "Ah, Beatrice. I remember you being so little!"

I still am, though I don't say that. I just muster a smile because my mother gives me a look. I'm being impolite.

"You can call me Karen, honey." She says, rubbing my shoulder. I nod simply, and out if the corner of my eye I see my mother's lips form in a tight line.

Karen takes my mother into the living room after telling Christina to show me around. Christina leads me down the hallway, walking to fast for me to admire the artwork. Her kitchen is nice, connected to the dining room, with a large table filled with ten chairs. My stomach feels queasy at the thought of a big family.

"You can call me Chris." Christina picks up an apple from a bowl sitting on the countertop. "And you can set your sunglasses down, if you want."

I'm perfectly content with keeping my shades on, and calling her Christina. Or Christina Payne, as a picture in the kitchen has written in the bottom corner. She probably made it in first or second grade, stick figures surrounding the same yellow house we're in.

I suddenly hear laughter from upstairs, a girl's, then two male voices. One loud and enthusiastic, the other quiet and irritated.

"Oh sorry," Christina brushes past me. "My friends are over. I'll bring them down."

_Please don't,_ I almost say. I make a small sound in protest, a whimper of sorts, and she raises her eyebrows.

"Uh," I swallow. "Yeah, okay."

She slowly nods then disappears. I listen to the conversation happening in the other room.

"She just...needs to get away." My mother's voice says. It's not worried. Almost like having me stay here is for her sake, not mine.

"She deserves to be happy." Karen's tone is soothing. I repeat those words in my mind the rest of the day.

I deserve to be happy.

Maybe I'll believe it, some day.

"Really? I want to meet her!" An excited voice shouts from upstairs. I have the urge to run outside the screen door leading to the backyard in the dining room, but I stay frozen in place. Footsteps, then whispering I can't make out, and then laughing.

Four other people enter behind Christina. Only one is a girl, brown hair and pretty green eyes that light up when she sees me. Her dress is a pale pink color, tiny flowers patterned on it.

"Hi!" She chirps, skipping, _skipping_, up to me. She holds out her hand, like Christina did. "I'm Marlene. I'm so happy you're staying with her!" She leans in closer to me, and I wipe my palms on my pants. "Chris gets annoying after a while." She whispers, winking. I nod, fear prickling up my arms. I don't do people.

"Marlene, let her breathe." A boy with bronze skin and dark hair comes up from behind her. He rests his chin on her head. "I'm Uriah." His grin is dazzling, pearly whites making me dizzy. Marlene pushes him off and shakes her head.

"She'll like me better," another boy pipes in, arm around Christina's shoulders. She leans into him, and there adoring eyes almost make me smile.

"I'm Will." A lock of curly blonde hair falls into his celery green eyes.

They all start to talk to each other, me standing in between Will an Christina and Marlene and Uriah. It takes me a minute to catch sight of the other boy, leaning against the doorway.

Well, not really a boy, but a man. His dark hair is longer than Uriah's, but definitely shorter than Will's, but I still see his ears, which stick out a little. He has a spare upper lip than compliment his fuller, lower one, and black eyes that stare at Christina. I feel something bubble up inside of me, and I realize that I think he's _handsome_. I had never really thought of a boy like that, but I suppose Uriah isn't that bad looking as well...

His eyes flicker to mine and stay there, determined and set. I'm the first to finally break my gaze. I don't know how I managed to look away. I liked staring at the attractive boy leaning against the doorway.

"Oh, that's Tobias." Christina must notice my staring, because she grins at me. Tobias slightly winces at the name.

"Hi." His voice is deep, and quiet. It calms me, because Marlene is too loud and Uriah laughs to much, and everything is noisy. I shut my eyes.

"You okay, Tris?" I hear Uriah say. I raise my eyebrows slightly. Tris?

"Beatrice." I say, my voice harsh. Not small. "And yes, fine." To my surprise, I shove Will out of my way, stomping out of the room. I don't know where my room is going to be, so I stand in the hallway. I try to study the paintings, but my fists are clenched and my face feels hot, and I'm having trouble staying still. I'm angry. Why am I angry?

Like I told my mother before we got in the damn car.

I don't like people.

These are times that I think of Caleb. Or my father. The ache in my chest hurts, yes, but there's also a feeling of comfort, of joy. I think of Caleb's laugh, and his books, and his hair until the feeling of anger and uncomfortableness fade away.

It's times like this that I deserve to be happy.

**HELLO. See, this is like my third...or fourth? Idek, but this isn't my first story on here, although I deleted my other ones, since I wasn't happy with them. I took a lot more time with this one, and I think I'm pretty happy with it. Sorry if any grammar/spelling mistakes are in here. CHARACTERS WILL BE OOC* but isn't that the joy of AU fics? **

**More details on Caleb/Tris' Father in the next few chapters, and there will be flashbacks with her past and such. **

**OMFG DIVERGENT IN LIKE, 2 MONTHS. OMGOMGOMGOMG. I AM FUHREAKING. Like you don't even know. I started crying when I realized that its like, six weeks away. Crying. Idek. OMFG.**

**Anyway, please review, or not, it's whatevs. **

**lol just kidding. Review. Now. **

**~SH**

**(I just rewatched all three seasons of Sherlock this weekend. Sorrynotsorry)**

**~Sofie**


	2. Chapter 2

**I like, really don't like this chapter, but I wanted to write something so I did. This is just a filler chapter. Disclaimer: Now why the hell would Veronica Roth be writing fanfiction about her own goddamn story? She would 't so I'm not her, OBVIOUSLY. **

I don't wake up all at once. I open my eyes, groggily, stare up at the blurry ceiling, then eventually roll over onto my stomach, and drift off again. I almost forget I'm not in my own house. I do this twice, or three times, until I'm finally, fully awoken by a hand shaking my shoulder.

On instinct, I swat that hand away. My mother did this every morning. Shake me. Shout at me, then sigh and leave the room. Not until after leaving my medicine on the bed side table, though.

I then register that I'm not in my own bed. The sheets aren't gray and Caleb's books aren't stacked up on my dresser. I'm with Karen. My mother left me yesterday.

Last night, Christina showed me to the room I'll be staying in after her friends left. Uriah flashed me another glorious smile, and Marlene giggled when I wrinkled my nose at him. I stayed on the bed, counting the wooden floor planks, for hours it seemed, until Karen called for dinner. I ate it silently, not looking up from my plate, only speaking a 'thank you' when I finished.

Christina offered me a shower, which I declined, and I went straight back to the room. I didn't get lost thankfully, even though there are four other rooms upstairs. I suspected two were for Christina and Karen, but the other two, I didn't know.

Like usual, I didn't go to sleep at a reasonable time, even when I heard Christina jumping on to her bed and shouting goodnight. Karen heard me when I accidentally laughed at a joke i remember Caleb made when we were little. She looked at me with pity, which I didn't appreciate at all, and gave me a drink, telling me it would help me sleep. It did.

I sit up, stretching my arms up over my head. I've been doing this since I was a child. I jump a little when I register the little girl on my right.

She must have been the one waking me up. She resembles Karen and Christina, except her hair is longer, reaching down to her waist, and her eyes are a yellow color. Like honey. Her hair is pulled to the left side of her head in a braid. It doesn't look like the one Susan taught me how to so in second grade. It looked more difficult, complicated twists and turns. She smiles a little at me, like she knows who I am. Maybe she did.

"Good morning." Her voice isn't sweet like Karen's, or loud and dramatic like Christina's. Sure, Christina talked normally when I met her, but when she was with her friends it changed to its normal state. I like this girl's voice. It's quiet and small, almost like mine, except not as timid.

"Good morning." I finally say. She holds at the hand that woke me, which isn't much smaller than my own, although she looks like she's ten or eleven. I shake it once before dropping it.

"Breakfast is ready."

"Thank you." I reply. When she doesn't move, I shift awkwardly.

"Uh, can you um, leave?" I wince as soon as the words are out, but to my surprise, she doesn't look offended. She just raises her eyebrows slightly and the corners of her lips turn upward.

"Uh, I mean I need to change and all-"

"Yeah, I know." She giggles. "Come downstairs when you feel like it." I smile softly because she didn't say when I'm ready. When I feel like it.

"Thank you." I say again. She nods and walks out of the room, her shoes making no sound against the wood floor.

I get up slowly, running my fingers through my hair. The ends are split. My mother stopped giving me haircuts a long time ago. I started to cut my hair myself, but it never looked as good as when she did it.

I slip on a pair of leggings, leaving my feet bare of the uncomfortable shoes I brought. I feel a lump in my throat when I catch sight of one of Caleb's sweatshirts in the closet. My mother had said she packed me nothing that would remind me of him; but I'm glad she did. I put it on and brush my teeth in the bathroom next to the room. I feel weird brushing my teeth in a house that's not my own.

I walk outside the bathroom and see the little girl by the stairs, waiting for me.

"I'm Alexis." She tells me as we descend down the stairs. The smell of pancakes and bacon fill the air. I've only had pancakes a few times. I didn't really like them, and I'm not hungry, so I start to turn around to go back to the room. Alexis looks pleadingly at me.

"Her friends are here." She says. "I don't like them very much. Please stay? We can eat in the living room, if you like."

I'm surprised by this. How much does she know about me? She obviously knew I didn't want to eat with a bunch of people. That's probably the reason I don't want to go into the kitchen; the people, not the pancakes. I wonder if my mother or Karen told her this.

"Okay." My answer surprises me too. "Okay."

She sighs in relief and starts walking down the hallway, me trailing behind her. She's almost as tall as I am.

"Tris!" Karen exclaims once she catches sight of me. There's that nickname again. I restrain myself from glaring, but I must look angry, because a girl with short hair snickers at me. But she smiles after, so I know she wasn't laughing at me.

"Beatrice!" Marlene exclaims from the table. She's smiling too; I wonder if her lips hurt everyday from doing this so often. Probably.

The pixie hart cut girl sits down next to her, Uriah on Marlene's left, and Christina in the head chair. I see Will's unruly blonde hair in the chair across from Uriah, and the boy Tobias next to him. Alexis grimaces before sitting down in the chair next to the short haired girl, leaving the only available seat next to Tobias.

Karen hands me a plate with pancakes strapped with sweet syrup, three strips of bacon and strawberries on the side. I thank her quietly before turning around and going back up the stairs.

"SHE gets to eat upstairs?!" Uriah screeches. "Wow, Momma Payne, wow."

Karen laughs before beckoning me back. "TRIS!" She calls. "Get down here."

I gulp, making sure to go very slowly back to the dining room full of people who are too noisy.

"Take your medicine after you eat, honey." Karen tells me as I sit down next to Tobias. I get a few questioning looks, making me want to sink down in my chair. The girl with short hair smiles softly to herself.

"Hi." The boy Tobias nudges me with his elbow. I turn to look at him, which is proven very distracting. His eyes don't roam around my face but stay locked on mine, and I feel as of someone's twisting my insides with a fork. We stay like that for what seems like en eternity before I manage to open my mouth.

"Hi."

He then turns back to the rest of the table. He doesn't engage in the conversation (which is currently about whether Zeke, whoever that is, is coming to visit over the summer or not). I finally look back down at my plate. I eat the bacon and strawberries, but my pancakes lay untouched, and the syrup has sunken into them, so leave them alone. After few minutes of counting the lights on the chandelier, two arms grab my plate.

"More for me!" Uriah exclaims. He takes Alexis' spot, which is the other head chai an devours my plate. He grins when he's finished and looks me over. He doesn't do it how the boy Tobias did it; his chocolate eyes flicker to my nose, my forehead, my arms, my cheeks, my lips. It doesn't necessarily make me uncomfortable, but I don't enjoy it either.

Christina flicks his ear. "Twat."

"What?" Alexis questions from the living room.

"Oh, it means-"

"URIAH." Karen shouts disapprovingly, waving her finger at him. My mother didn't mind if Caleb cursed. My father someone's scowled at him, though. But 'twat' doesn't sound that bad, I guess.

People talk to much here. My mother rarely made a sound, so this excess noise makes me feel dizzy. I put my plate in the sink as I'd seen the others do and head into the bathroom, where Karen said my pills were. I dry swallow them as I'd done many times before; I, sometimes, wouldn't take my medicine when my motet told me too. Then in the middle of the night I'd feel guilty, and quietly walk downstairs to take it. I wouldn't want to risk my mother waking, so I never poured water. My mother could wake to the sound of the wind howling at night.

I'm startled when I see short haired girl in the doorway. Her fierce face is softened by the happy look in her eyes.

"I take medicine too." She says quietly. I've never met anyone who takes medicine like me, even if they aren't sick.

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"Why?"

Oddly, she doesn't go embarrassed or angry. She just answers me.

"It helps me gain weight."

"Okay." I don't ask her why she needs to gain weight, even though I'm confused. Most girls probably want to loose weight.

"What do your pills do?"

I normally wouldn't answer, but if she takes them she will probably understand. "They help me, too."

"Gain weight?"

"No."

She raises her eyebrows.

"They help make me happy." I say. My mother told me this the first time I took them. She nods.

"That's good. I'm Lynn, by the way."

"Oh. Okay." I suspect she already knows my name.

Then she steps out of the bathroom and she's gone.

**Well that sucked. Sorry. Apologies. Forgive me. **

**BUT CHAPTER THREE HAS TOBIAS. **

**OMFG Shailene and Theo on Jimmy Kimmel. And the zip lining and how he grabbed her waist and just omg the feeeeeels. **

**I watched the fault in our stars trailer again today. I cried. **

**A boy at my school is reading Divergent. I freaked. **

**Okay, so, nows the part where you follow and review, okay? **

**Okay?**

**Okay.**

**NONOTFUCKINGOKAY. (Me after reading the fault in our stars.) **

**~Sofie.**


	3. Chapter 3

**SPOILER: MY FOURTRIS MOMENTS SUCK AT LEAST YOU HAVE A FOURTRIS MOMENT THO OK **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Divergent, Harry Potter, Footloose, Hunger Games or any other book/movie/company mentioned in this chapter:) **

"You're staring." Tobias says. He says it like he's stating the weather, or like he's telling me something as simple as how many clouds are in the sky. Nonetheless, my cheeks burn, and I focus my eyes onto my hands, which are folded neatly on my lap. He laughs a little.

"I don't mind."

I nod, and manage to choke out an 'okay'. It's not like I meant to look at him; it just sort of...happened.

Because the boy Tobias was captivating. He wasn't gorgeous, like Uriah, or cute, in a way Will was, but I still found myself noticing the shape of his nose, tracing the arch of his eyebrows, the faint curl of his lip, making small bubbles of...something rise in my stomach. It felt weird, strange. I didn't necessarily not like the feeling-and _that's _what I didn't like. I didn't like that I didn't _not _like it.

Marlene and Uriah are outside. They both had a strange urge for cupcakes, so Christina and Lynn are at the store getting some. Will sits in the arm chair, reading a book with thirsty eyes. He reminds me a bit of Caleb, from the way he holds the book to the color of his eyes.

I'm not upstairs because I'm not allowed. Karen told me it was because she was cleaning the rooms, but I have the sneaking suspicion she just wants me to interact with them. Tobias sits in front of me, legs crossed and leaning back on his arms. His shirt is tight.

"God _DAMMIT _Gale." Will lets out a groan of frustration and throws his book across the room. That's not what Caleb did. He could have despised the book, but he never mistreated one. Never. I didn't know why.

"The Hunger Games sucks. It's highly overrated."

"You would know." Tobias teases, grinning. His smile isn't too big, thankfully.

"I would, actually." Will retorts.

The front door opens, and I hear the laughter of Christina and Lynn in the

hallway. They beckon Uriah and Marlene in, holding up boxes of pink cupcakes. The pair quickly starts eating them, Uriah wiping some icing onto Marlene's hair.

"I need to find a good book."

"Yes, you do!" Tobias holds up a hand to his forehead, dramatically. "It is so awfully dreadful to see thou in such terrible pain."

"I don't know why I hang out with them," Will says, looking at me. "I really don't..."

"It's because you love us!" Lynn shouts from the kitchen. She walks over to me and Tobias and sits next to him, very close.

"Whatever. Ugh, Gale is such an idiot."

"I know," Lynn says. "Killing Prim and-"

"Fuck, Lynn! I thought you'd quit with the spoilers!" Uriah whines. Lynn's mouth quirks.

"Never, Uri. Katniss ends up with Gale, Charlie kisses Sam, Cedric dies-"

"OH MY _GOD_!" Uriah flicks the pink icing at Lynn, hitting her thin nose, and it splatters over her face and shirt. She laughs, licking it off her lips.

Tobias chuckles too, his laugh like thunder, and wipes some of it off her forehead. He smiles wickedly at me, and before I can stop him, touches his fingertips to my jaw. Just a whisper of a touch, trailing down my neck, slowly. His skin is acid, burning mine and making my insides feel like they're going to explode. I grit my teeth, wanting him _off_ and smack his hand away. I let in a shaky breath, and he stares at me for a while before finally turning away.

Luckily, everyone was to busy talking about how Uriah still hasn't finished the Harry Potter series to notice..._whatever_ just happened. The feeling happens again; I don't like that I don't not like it.

Uriah huffs. "You guys are mean. I'm leaving. Mar, come with me?" She smiles adoringly at him before following out the door. Christina sits on Will's lap, arms snaking around his neck. Lynn scrunches her face, and that seems to remind her that she's caked in...well, cake. She excuses herself to clean off 'Uriah's Wrath'.

"Are we going to the beach?" Will asks Christina, nose sliding along her jaw. She noticeably shivers, and I feel like I'm intruding on something. They seem aware of the fact that I'm here though, so I don't think they mind...

"I dunno. You guys never come, and Uriah and Marlene are probably making out somewhere," Will laughs against her neck. "Beatrice, do you want to come?"

Oh, god no. I hate the beach. It's not like other things I don't like. There's nothing that happened there that makes me not like it. It's just too much. It's too hot, then too cold once you get out of the water, the sand is too uncomfortable and there's too many people. Too much _everything. _I shake my head quickly.

Lynn retreats back to the living room. "You up for the beach, Lynn?"

"Sure." Lynn answers. "Shauna should be here in an hour. She'll probably want to come. Zeke too."

"I'll text Uri on the way to your place." Christina kisses Will's forehead. "Love you." She then sticks her tongue out at him and kicks Tobias' side.

"Later dorks." Lynn waves to me and then they walk out, after Christina shouting, "Oh, and bye Beatrice!"

Tobias snickers, poking my arm. It doesn't last nearly as long as last time, and I'm thankful.

"She thinks your a dork, too." He tells me.

Tobias searches through the large box of DVDs, making sounds at ones he doesn't like and placing ones that look promising in a separate pile on the floor next to him. Will comes back into the room two glasses of water in his hand. He hands one to me, and I set it on the coffee table. I'm sitting on the hard leather couch, knees tucked into my chest, arms wrapped around my legs.

"We're watching Footloose." He announces, and Tobias groans.

"No. We watch it every damn time."

"It wasn't a question, Tobias."

"I don't care. We're not watching it."

"Now let's not get selfish, Toby." Will purrs. "Beatrice might want to see it." He says, gesturing to me. I'm still mad about Tobias and his stupid magic fingers so I say, "I want to watch it." Will wears a smug look.

"Put it in."

Tobias does, then plops down next to me, so close are thighs are almost touching. God...

"Where's my drink?"

"In your ass." Will answers without looking at him. "Get it yourself."

Tobias grumbles, but gets up and opens the fridge. The previews are playing, and I don't really pay attention to them.

"WHERE'S THE LEMONADE."

"I think Marlene finished it."

"Damn you, Marlene. Damn you."

I raise my eyebrows.

Will shrugs. "He's always had a thing for lemonade. It's become an obsession, honestly."

Tobias comes back, frowning, coke in hand. He doesn't sit as close this time, and I almost sigh in relief, but I stop myself at the last second.

"But Will," Tobias says before the movie starts. "There's some, er...no-no scenes.."

"Some _what?" _

"There's like, two makeout scenes," Will answers me, and I freeze and my eyes widen. Why, did I, agree. "They're like, hot, I guess-"

"Will."

"Calm down, Tobias, the actors are good-looking, so-"

"Oh my god." Tobias looks purely horrified, pretty much how I feel.

"Okay, okay, I'll fast forward them."

When the part comes, Will 'accidentally' sets it into slow motion.

"Whoops," he say. "Sorry."

"Oh. My. God."

"Apologies, Tobias, can't find the remote.."

"I hate you."

"Shush! Ooh, look, I think I saw some to tongue!"

Tobias scoots even further away from me.

"DID YOU NOT LOVE IT?"

Before I can respond, Tobias rolls his eyes and says, "Eh, Grease is better."

"You wish." Will struts into the kitchen. Tobias shakes his head and leans in, close to me, and my breathing hitches.

"It is." He says lowly, quiet like we're sharing a secret. His eyes flicker down to my neck, and I stay frozen, too afraid to move. His hand moves upward, and he looks at me for a second, then traces the icing off my skin. He does it like he did the first time; softly, gentle, and slow, very slow, making me want to squirm. _He' touching me,_ and I don't stop him, even when I feel my toes curl and my head get dizzy; it's not from noise this time, though. He licks the icing off his finger.

"Hmm," he says, biting his lower lip, just slightly. "Tastes even better." The last part is just above a whisper, and I still. Can't. Move.

Will walks back in, and Tobias leaves me room to breathe, actually breathe and not that pathetic little thing I was doing when he was close. I don't even know him.

"Gross, I have work soon." Will stares out the window longingly. Tobias doesn't have to work," he tells me. "But I do."

"Yes," Tobias says. "Life's unfair and the world is completely against you."

Will smirks. "Christina's against me."

"Did you seriously just say that."

"Sure did, prude."

"I need better friends."

Will smacks his back.

"You and me both, Toby."

**I wrote this chapter really fast so sorry if it's really bad and has improper grammar and punctuation or spelling. **

**So yeah...this chapter was ba jokes, Tobias licking icing off Beatrice, and Will being the adorable, witty ass he is. **

**Sorry if Uriah's really annoying. He's gonna be annoying. **

**And Tobias is going to be like, the most OOC little shit ever, so...**

****NEXT CHAPTER**: ZEKE, COOKIES and beatricefeelingweirdbecausetobiasfliiirrrtttssss**

**THANK YOU TO THE 23 FOLLOWERS WHO PROBABLY DIDN'T REVIEW. **

**Naw, but seriously, thanks for following and reviewing and favoriting and just reading. **

**Ill update when I have time. Or when I feel like it. I'm bad with schedules:p**

**~Sofie**


	4. Chapter 4

**HI. **

**mkay, so, i lied. Zeke isn't introduced in this chapter, and they don't bake cookies, and Tobias (sadly) doesn't flirt. There's an actual ****_important author's note at the end! _**

**_DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWM DIVERGENT BLOODY HELL. _**

I hear a knock on the door, which is partly open, and I look up at see Alexis, smiling.

"May I come in?" She asks.

"Why?" I shoot right back, more harshly than I intended. Scratch that. I did intend to sound angry. I was. At myself or the boy Tobais, I don't know.

"Woah, what's wrong?" Everything, I want to say. Everything and absolutely anything is wrong. Instead, I shrug, looking at the blank white walls, even if the brightness stings my eyes even worse than colors do.

Alexis sighs and closes the door behind her, walking over the the bed and siting on the edge.

"Tobias?" She asks after a while. I turn around to look at her. Eyebrows raised and mouth quirked.

"How did you know?"

She rolls eyes slightly. "Tobias is the most annoying person I've ever met." Annoying isn't a word I'd use for Tobias, but I nod my head anyway. She laughs. "Everyone seems to love him, for some reason."

"I don't like him."

Alexis smiles at me again. "I could tell. You don't like a lot of people." When I don't say anything, she adds quickly, "I don't either."

I highly doubt our reasons for not liking people are the same.

"Why did you come up here?" I'm still getting used to the fact that my mother isn't here to scold me, but I still imagine her frowning face in my mind. "I mean-"

"No, it's okay. We're leaving soon, so mom told me to come and tell you."

My pulse quickens. "W...where are we going?" I ask, nervously. My palms find their usual place, wiping themselves on my pants.

She hesitates. "Uh..."

"Don't tell her!" Christina bursts through my door, breathing heavier than normal. I suspect she ran down the hallway to get here.

"Why not?" Alexis retorts, annoyance in her honey-colored eyes. Almost like honey, except clearer, brighter.

"It's a surprise." Well, _I'm _surprised Christina hasn't picked up that I don't like going anywhere.

"That's stupid." Alexis says. She stands up anyways, shoving her sister by the waist. Christina must be at least 5"9. "Be downstairs in ten," she calls over her shoulder.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Well," I here Will sigh. "If BEATRICE, DOESN'T GET DOWN HERE, WE MIGHT BE LATE." He then yells, making sure I hear him.

I'm reluctant to go downstairs, and this time, it's my just because of my anti-social ness, but because it's almost midnight. Who wouldn't be scared to go somewhere unknown?

"Where are we going?" I finally say. My voice sounds tight and squeaky.

"All in good time." Tobias appears at the bottom of the stairs, a mischievous grin on his other wise lovely face. I didn't even know people could be lovely. But actually, Tobias isn't. He just looks lovely. I suddenly understand why Caleb looked at Susan so much; he wanted to. Enjoyed it. That's why I was staring at the boy Tobias today. That was before I _met _him, though.

"Tell her where you guys are going." Karen says. "And be safe. You guys are spending the night, yes?"

"Of course." Will responds next to Tobias. "Uriah will probably fall asleep driving again, like last time..oops, um, bye Karen!" He dashes out the door, pulling Christina with him.

As I stay standing at the top of the stairs, Tobias looks at me. A practical, scientific gaze, not lingering anywhere. "Beatrice," he says this in a way that makes my skin crawl. "Do you really want to know?"

I glare at him through narrowed eyes. "Obviously. I've been asking for the past five minutes, haven't I?"

"I'll tell you." He smiles a little, to himself. "I mean, if you sit next to me."

"Why would I sit next to you?"

Tobias smirks, amusement dancing in his smile. "Because you want to know where we're going, of course."

I open my mouth to recline his offer, when Alexis opens the front door and shouts, "EATON! GET YOUR ASS-"

"Alexis!" Karen shouts disapprovingly from the kitchen. Alexis huffs out, exasperated.

"Sorry mom!" She looks back to Tobias. "Dude, hurry the heck up."

"Apologies, Alexis." Tobias says, calmly, and for some reason I want to clamp my hands around his neck until it snaps. "Beatrice isn't cooperating." Yep. I'm already halfway down the stairs. I could jump on him right now...

But even the thought of touching him, again, makes me feel dizzy.

"Tris," Alexis whispers, like Tobias can't hear her. It doesn't sound as bad as it does when other people say it. "Please come."

Tobias looks at me pointedly. I shove past him, making sure to touch the skin covered by fabric, and stomp to Alexis. She breathes out a 'thanks', then points to my bare arms. A cold gush of wind blows into the house. I took off Caleb's sweatshirt earlier. Tobias is already taking off his jacket, and I tell him no by crossing my arms.

"It's okay." I say to Alexis. She knows I don't want Tobias' jacket that probably smells like him (sweet sweat and something distinctly male), so she doesn't object. Alexis walks out, my trailing behind her.

I suddenly feel something warm tickling my ear, hot lips against it, and a shiver races down my spine, not from the cold. Tobias' low voice sounds through my bones.

"Sit next to me?"

My mind is too blurry to think right, and my knees feel weak, and I have to close my eyes. Tobias' mouth doesn't leave the spot below my ear, resting on the sensitive skin.

I don't know what else I to do, what I can do, so I give a small sound in reply.

"I'll take that as a yes."

**Okay, I'm sorry, I had to put a fourtris moment in here. this chapter is really awful, but I wanted to give you guys something for your awesome reviews. **

**IMPORTANT:**

**I'm taking a poll.**

**Would you rather have**

***3-4 short(by short i mean around 1,000 words, that's short to me) chapters every week? **

**or, **

***2 longer (3,000 words or so,) chapters a week?**

**so far it's been shorter chapters, but personally, I like reading a few longer chapters than a bunch of short ones. But hey, that's me. **

**Anywayys, thank you so much for following, favoriting, and reviewing this story. Means a lot. **

**I also MIGHT be uploading another story, but it will be updated less frequently, so look out for a new one! **

**~Sofie.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Okay, sorry for not updating sooner.**

**I had a bunch of family stuff to do and yeah it was awful. **

**Sooo, a lot of you voted on longer chapters, which I was hoping for so, yay! This one isn't much longer than the others, but the next one definitely will be. **

**This chapter is really boring and sort of a filler, but next chapter is the GAME so that will be fun. Also, a lot of stuff is revealed about Caleb, so ill make sure to get that one up next week. **

**HOLAY SHIT DIVERGENT IS OUT IN LIKE ONE MONTH. Oh my god. **

**Anyways, hope you enjoy! **

5

The car Will drives to wherever we're going is Karen's. It's an ugly brown van, and I wrinkle my nose a bit. My mother's car was gray, and small, like me. It also smells like Christina, which is too much perfume and coffee. I think I'm getting a headache.

The one thing I do like about this is that, I don't have to sit next to Tobias. I don't feel comfortable at all not knowing where they're taking me, but Alexis is here and I really don't think I can handle Tobias being close to me...again.

There's two seats up front, for Christina and Will, Tobias sits in one of the two seats behind them, and me and Alexis in the very back. She sits in the middle, close to me, but I don't mind. Her presence is comforting. I don't know why, though. I don't usually like anyone-and if I do, it's because they remind me of Caleb, which only Will does. I still like Alexis more. Maybe because she's not loud, or obnoxious, and she doesn't invade my space and she doesn't make me talk. Probably.

Tobias turns around and stares at me. He does it differently than the other times. His eyes roam, like Uriah's, but to small details. Like the scar on my collarbone, from when I got scratched by a dog. Or the beauty mark by my left eye. And he smiles, too, but not at me. His mouth curls to himself.

I raise my eyebrows mouthing, 'where are we going?'

He rolls his eyes and mouths, 'had to sit on my lap, sweetheart.'

I start to correct him by saying I didn't have to sit on him (my cheeks start to burn) but I'm cut off by the pounding of a bass, and the blast of a drum. The screeching of a guitar soon follows, and yeah, I most definitely have a headache.

"God, Will, your music sounds like somebody's dying." Alexis says, or shouts, so he can hear her.

"The singing or the instruments?" Will asks, and I see him in the mirror above his head, grinning.

Alexis grimaces. "Both."

When the pain from the awfully loud 'music' turns into a dull throb in the back of my skull, I nudge Alexis lightly.

"Can you please tell me why we're going out at midnight?"

She shrugs. "Some party, or something." At my widened eyes, she adds, "just the people you know. Marlene, Uriah, Lynn. A few other people, too." That didn't help, quite frankly.

The car halts to a stop in front of a nice house, a white color with two stories. Tobias opens the door do me, offering his hand. To make a point, I don't take it, but I end up falling a little, and I stumble to regain my balance. I hear Tobias try to conceal his laughter, without success. I only turn around to shoot him a glare, which he just shakes his head at.

While everyone else walks up the pathway leading to the double doors, I stay where I am. I'm exhausted. I talked a lot today, I interacted a lot today, and I definitely do not want to do more of it. Confusion crosses my mind when I think of people doing this everyday. How?

Tobias stands in front of me. He doesn't look like he wants an explanation. It's like he knows that I don't want to go in. Most people should be that smart. I think I make it pretty clear I don't do 'parties'. Or people. Or anything, for that matter.

"What's your favorite color?"

I stare at him. The moonlight drenched his features, making them look better. Tobias is pretty.

For some reason, my mother comes to mind. "Gray."

She always bought me gray clothes. She understood, and listened, and she knew that I liked those best. They weren't vibrant or dramatic, just gray, easy on the eyes, and the mind. The corners of my lips twitch.

"Yeah," I say. "Gray."

He looks at me again, in a way I could only describe as awe. I play with my hands.

"Why'd you ask that, anyway?"

Tobias shrugs. "Curious." He looks over at the door, which is open and Christina and Will are already going in. Alexis hangs back, watching us, perplexed.

"Ready?" Tobias asks, nodding his head towards the entrance. I smile a little.

"No." I follow him, nonetheless.

XXX

Uriah greets me, laughing.

"Tris!" He yells, waving his arm. Marlene stands next to him, giggling into her drink. Alcohol smells terrible.

"He's had to many drinks," Lynn says to me, smirking. She stands with her arms crossed. "Then again, he always acts drunk, doesn't he?"

"True." An older girl resembling Lynn sits on the couch next to her, typing something on her phone. She looks up at me. "Hi, I'm Shauna. You're name's Beatrice, yeah?"

I nod and try to smile. Maybe she takes medicine too, like me and Lynn.

Christina comes back into the living room, beer bottles in her hands. She hands one to Will and Tobias, who looks calm, like he's done this a thousand times. Maybe he has. I don't know him. I met him three, four days ago.

"You want a drink, Beatrice?" Christina asks me. I'm already feeling nauseous from the stench. I shake my head quickly.

"No." I say, gulping. "No thank you."

Alexis comes up to me, plugging her nose. "Come outside with me?"

I follow her towards a back door, leading to a giant pool, with a jacuzzi and a waterfall. It glows, and it looks gorgeous, with bushes of flowers on the fence. Caleb would have liked it. He liked roses.

Alexis breathes out once she closes the door. "That smells awful," she says with disgust. I nod in agreement, she and she looks at me, accusation on her face.

"What's wrong?" I finally ask. I don't want Alexis to be mad at me.

"You don't hate Tobias." What? I start to object, but stop, shaking my head. I don't hate Tobias. He touches me too much, yes, but he seems fine. He's fun to look at, too. I force that thought away.

"Not really." I say. "Why do you hate him?"

"I don't..." Alexis sighs. "It's just, he's so happy all the time. It's weird, you know?"

I almost want to yell at her. It's not weird, at all. I think it's beautiful. Envy flashes through me, just for a moment. I never got how anyone could be happy all the time, let alone for a week, or a day. I'm jealous of Tobias, because I'd forgotten how that feels. Why would you hate some one because they're happy?"

"I don't hate him." Alexis says. "He just annoys me. It's like he wants to remind everyone that even if their day sucks, he's always going to be smiling and laughing."

She has a point there. Tobias did laugh, and smile a lot. He was charismatic. His voice was deep, and low, and quiet, almost intimidating. But he was joyful. And Alexis thought that was annoying.

Maybe it's just me. Maybe because I don't know how that feels, I admire people who do. Maybe everyone finds happiness annoying.

"Oh."

"Do...do you like him?"

I shrug. "Yeah. He's nice." Except when he touches me. Or when he says pretty things into my ear, which seems a little too friendly. The icing incident runs through my mind.

"No, like," Alexis shakes her head, seeming exasperated. "Never mind."

"Hey," Will opens the door we're standing in front of. "We're playing a game. Join us?"

"What's it called?"

"Never have I ever." He looks at Alexis. "You're too young to play. You can watch TV in Zeke's room, upstairs." By the way he says it, it seems like this has happened before.

"Yay." Alexis says, sarcasm in her tone. She shoves past Will, leaving me alone to play games. I walk inside, and it feels too hot compared to outside.

"Come on, Tris," Tobias says. He places a hand on my back, fingers longer than average. "Sit next to me this time, yeah?"

**Goddamn I dunno bout you but I was *this close* to having Tobias and Beatrice start making out right there. **

**Oh well. **

**Im almost at 40 reviews! Thank you guys for favoriting, following, and reviewing. **

**NEXT CHAPTER THERE'S A WHOLE SCENE OF TROBIAS. **

**Im pretty freaking excited. **

**Anyyyyywwaaaaayyyyyy, **

**Next chapter NEXT WEEK. **

**It's going to be like, really long, to the point where it's annoying tho. **

**Sorry. **

**Oh well. **

**~Sofie**


	6. Chapter 6

**MKAY I SAID THERE'S GONN BE A TROBIAS SCENE. **

**BUT THERE'S NOT. **

**so sorry. **

**Well, there's little snippets of cute little sexual tension so that's good right? **

**AND THIS CHAPTER IS LONG. not super long _long _  
**

**But long. you feel me?**

**I GOT 40 REVIEWS AND FOLLOWERS. Its not that much, to some people, but it is to ME. So thanks to all of you. **

**This Never have I ever sucks so sorry. **

**Oh, and I forgot to mention Uriah is passed out and in his room sleeping while they play, so, YEAAAHH. **

**Disclaimer: I have this really awesome dress, but I don't have Divergent, or Dr. Pepper, so the dress doesn't really matter:(**

_**TRIS**_

I turn around and face Tobias, glaring. He just smiles a little, and walks into the next room. I still feel the pressure of his hand on my back. I shake my head, and follow Will into the kitchen, ignoring the putrid smell in the air.

"How do you play?" I ask him. He starts taking out plastic cups, filling them with Dr. Pepper. I wasn't allowed to drink soda when I was little.

"Well, we go around in a circle," Will starts. "When it's your turn, you say something you've never done. If someone has done it, they have to take a sip. When your cup is empty, you're out."

"That's stupid."

"I know." He flashes me a grin. "But it's fun. Usually Lynn or Tobias wins, because those losers don't do shit." He hands me two cups. "Start handing them out."

I nod, and walk into the room where we're supposed to play. I hand Shauna one, and a boy who looks surprisingly a lot like Uriah. He smiles.

"Thanks." He seems to know who I am. "Tell Will to get his ass in here, would you?"

When everybody has a cup, I take a seat on the couch, next to Tobias.

Will walks into the room, eating a brownie, and his eyes widen when he catches sight of the boy.

"Zeke!" He yells, dropping his food. "You're here!"

"I am here," Zeke says, smirking. "And you're there. And Toby's over there. And-"

"Shut up." Will walks over to me and bumps my hip with his. "Hey scoot over, would you?"

My thighs are now pressed against Tobias'.

"I start!" Zeke shouts, turning down the music. Thank god. I was ready to burn something.

Tobias' fingers brush my wrist, making me want to squirm. Scratch that. Burn _someone._

"Never have I ever been drunk." Everyone besides Will and me puts their cup to their lips.

Shauna, whose next to him, goes. "Never have I ever been in a relationship." She says, looking straight at Christina. Her, Will, and Marlene, Uriah, and Zeke all take a sip.

"Never have I ever had a number as nickname." Marlene announces, and I scrunch my eyebrows up at her. Tobias takes a drink. What?

"Never have I ever kissed someone." Lynn announces without shame, a smug smile on her face. Oh. She thinks all of us have kissed a person. I'm the only one who doesn't take a sip. Tobias raises an eyebrow at me, smirking. His lips are wet; I don't realize I'm staring at them until he turns red.

I never got kissing. Quite frankly, it seems...weird. I don't like people. I certainly do not want their mouth to mine. I shudder.

"Never have I ever skinny dipped!" Will says, looking pointedly at Lynn. She drinks, and I feel sick. Who would ever...

It's my turn. I've picked up that you're supposed to say things you know the others have done. "Never have I ever been to public school."

They all stare at me in surprise, but take a swig. Tobias speaks.

"Never have I ever had a sibling."

I feel like someone put a stone in my stomach, an ache passing through me. I feel tears brimming at the edges of my closed eyes. Not here, not now.

This is my first sip.

"Never have I ever had straight A's." Christina says, distracting me. Tobias, Will, Zeke, and I take a sip. I think my mother just gave me A's while she homeschooled me. I didn't think I earned them.

This goes on for a few more rounds. Shauna, Marlene, Will, and Zeke are out. Lynn thinks for a second, then her eyes light up.

"Never have I ever had romantic feelings for someone."

I ignore Tobias staring at me as he drinks.

"Never have I ever shaved my head." Tobias shoots right back. Lynn scowls at him, and finishes her cup. I'm up.

"Never have I ever been out of the country." Neither of them drink.

Christina's turn. "Never have I ever been to a funeral." I choke on the air I'm breathing. I wish I _wasn't _breathing.

Nobody speaks as I bring the cup to my lips and swallow.

XxX

It's been 13 minutes of me and Tobias going back and forth, picking the most random things to say. My cup is still halfway full.

I suppose Shauna's getting bored of this, because she groans and says, "Can we have them settle this a different way?"

Will grins mischievously. "Yeah," he says. "They can play 'Too Hot." Oh, god. That doesn't sound very...

Lynn nods, cackling. "Sounds good. Or maybe..." How about maybe not? By the crimson shade on Tobias' cheeks, that game involves something I probably don't want to do. "'Are You Nervous Yet?' First one to say yes looses."

"Oh, definitely." Will agrees. "How does that sound, Toby?"

"There's a closet right over there," Zeke points down the hall. _What is going on?_ "Come on, Tobias." He nudges him with his elbow. "Show Beatrice how to play."

Tobias' eyes are narrowed, despite being embarrassed. "I'd prefer not to." I don't know whether that's good or bad. "Lets just continue playing this." His voice is deep, like it always is, but quiet. Not the quietness he uses when he talks to me. But he sounds...upset.

"Never have I ever been taller than 5"4." I say. Tobias smiles at me before drinking. He drains his cup, even though he didn't have to.

"I'll get you next time." He says. By this time, Zeke has turned to music back on. I hesitate, but then grab Tobias' arm and drag him towards to kitchen.

"What were those games they were suggesting?" I ask him. He chuckles, like thunder, and looks down at his feet. He reaches up and scratches the back of his neck, and without meaning to, I watch the muscles in his arms.

"Oh," another nervous laugh. "Um.."

Lynn walks in, smirking. She sits down on a stool by the counter, popping a chocolate into her mouth. There's a bowl of them.

"They're make out games," Lynn says. My eyes grow wide, and I'm sure I'm blushing as bad as Tobias. "Well, I mean, they could result in more-"

"Lynn!" Tobias shouts. She throws her head back in laughter.

"Hey, the lady wanted to know." She throws a chocolate at Tobias. "I could always let you show her, if you want..."

He throws it back at her.

XxX

I walk into Christina's room, still rubbing sleep from my eyes. I feel disgusting. It's been days since I last bathed. I wasn't comfortable at all taking one in someone else's house, but I'm sure I was starting to smell weird.

She's on her bed, looking at the TV screen on the wall opposite of her. Will lays with her, stroking her chestnut hair, looking at her with complete and utter adoration.

Lynn is there, too, but she doesn't look happy.

"Can I take a shower?"

Will tears his eyes away from his girlfriend and looks up at me. "No," he says, smiling. "You're forbid. Now leave." He resumes petting Christina.

"They're revolting." Lynn says to me, rolling her eyes. She suddenly yells, "TOBIAS!" When she gets no reply, she sighs.

"He's downstairs, probably looking for lemonade." Lynn stands up. "I'll show you to the bathroom."

She does, which is right next to Karen's room, then turns it on for me and leaves. I've noticed that about Lynn, and it's one of the things I like about her; she doesn't talk when she doesn't need to.

The shower temperature is warm, and I decide to leave it like that. I've never gotten why people take hot showers, they just hurt and leave red marks on my legs. Cold showers are the same, if not worse. I'm not going to get hypothermia because of a shower.

I stay still for seven minutes, letting the water run over me, admiring the droplets on my hands. I wash my hair, Christina's shampoo smells like her perfume, but I use it anyways, and then my body.

I'm not self-conscious. My mother once thought that I was...bad because I didn't like the way I look. But I never really got why anyone would make such a big deal about such foolish things.

I suspected that I would feel weird showering, and I do, a little bit, but I'm just glad I got to get clean. The feeling is nice. I reluctantly turn the water off, and dry myself with a yellow towel that was hanging up. It's not bright, but a softer color, and it smells like the shampoo I used.

It takes a moment for me to realize I've left my clothes in the room I'm sleeping in. It's just down the hall, but I don't want to risk anyone seeing me in just a towel. Again, it's not that I don't like my body. It's just, people don't have the right to see me that way. I like keeping myself private.

But I'm getting cold, and I can't stay in here forever, so I dash out the bathroom and walk quickly towards the door.

It's only five, and the sun is just setting, but I'm still tired from last night. We got home at three in the morning, despite Karen wanting us to spend the night, and I only slept for a few hours. I didn't come out of my room, again. It was a nice break from everything I've been doing. People may not see it as a lot, but I do. I certainly do.

After putting on gray sweatpants and a black tank top, I step out of the room. I'm hoping to find Alexis. She still seems a bit wary of me since the talk about Tobias, but I still like being around her. She's not in her bedroom, like she usually is, so I decide to ask Christina.

She shouts, 'come in', after I knock, so I do. Lynn and Tobias are on the floor, backs against the large bed, legs tangled together. Tobias didn't look at me since the suggestion of the games, but now he does. His stare is familiar. I stare back.

"Hey," Christina says. She and Will are still on the bed, both laying on their stomachs. "You took your damn time in the shower, Tris."

I feel a blush creep up on my neck. "Sorry."

"It's okay." She sits up crossing her legs. "I'm going to braid your hair. Sit down on the floor."

I cock an eyebrow.

"She has a weird fetish with people's hair." Lynn says. I've only braided my hair once, and I liked Alexis' braid she had on the first day I met her, so I sit next to Tobias.

"Hi." He says.

"Hi." I reply.

Christina's bed is low, so she can easily access my hair. It's still wet, so it's easier. Right from the beginning, I know it's not the braid I know how to do. Christina's fingers move fast, like she's done this before. Probably.

Tobias steals glances at me multiple times, smiling at me when I catch him. I almost smile back, but then Christina pulls extra hard on my hair and I yelp.

I look at the TV, and they're watching a show called 'My Strange Addiction.' I feel like throwing up 75% of the time.

"Babe, you should go on that show." Will says. "Christina Payne-obsessive hair braiding."

"Yeah," Christina chuckles. "Toby can go on it too. 'Lemonade Junkie.'"

Tobias laughs too. I watch his Adam's Apple bob up and down.

"What are we doing tomorrow?" He asks, peering up at Will. He shrugs.

"I don't know. I'm planning on getting a new book, since the Mockingjay ending was terrible. Like, they got married, did the deed, and had children. Whoop de fucking doo."

"Would you prefer them to die?" Lynn asks.

"Actually, yes. Because Peeta annoys me."

"Finnick shouldn't have died, though."

"I know! He was my man-crush!"

Tobias leans in close to me. My breathing falters. "Will thinks they're real." He murmurs, smiling. I allow the corners of my mouth to twitch upward.

"At least I'm not going to marry lemonade." Will retorts, throwing a pillow at Tobias.

Tobias shrugs. "It's good."

Remembering why I came to Christina's room in the first place, I ask her, "Where's Alexis?"

"At piano lessons." She answers. "She should be back soon."

"What?" Tobias asks, grinning. "Don't want to hang with us, Prior?"

Lynn snorts. "Because with Tobias _gawking _at you, it's totally understandable."

For the umpteenth time, my face burns.

Luckily, Tobias' does too, so bad he has to look away.

**I WAS VERY TEMPTED TO HAVE TRIS AND TOBIAS PLAY THOSE GAMES, BTWS. **

**But i didn't, so haha sucks :p **

**NEXT CHAPTER: BOOKSTORES (HOLLA), WILL'S COFFEE _godammit_, TROBIAS DANCE. **

**wow, for once this A/N wasn't super long and unnecessary. Please remember to review, favorite, and follow:)**

**~Sofie**


	7. Chapter 7

_**Hello! :) My apologies for my updating as frequently as I used to. School's a you-know-what :P**_

_**I've had a serious case of writer's block, so that's why this chapter is sort of boring, and why I haven't updated. So, please, PM or review any suggestions you have! I'd love to hear each and every one of them. **_

_**Quick Note: The characters in this story are very OOC, especially Tobias and Tris. The reasons behind that will soon be revealed, and they'll eventually develop the personalities they obtain in the actual book :)**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Divergent, or The Fault In Our Stars (if you haven't read it, go do that now!)**_

_**TRIS  
**_

When Alexis invites me to listen to one of her songs, I almost slap her. It's four in the morning, on a Sunday. This is one of the few nights I fell asleep without Karen's special drink; being here for three weeks and only having a handful, I like to enjoy them.

"I can't sleep," she explains, playing with her hands. "It helps me. Please?"

I groan a little, which causes her to laugh, but I get out of the bed and follow her down the hallway. Alexis' room is nice. Dark red walls with deep wood furniture, a painting of eleven yellow roses on her left wall. I make a mental note to ask her about them later.

The colors are a lot easier on my eyes than most of the house. She grabs a sheet of paper from her desk, and a pencil, then scurries down the stairs. She seems anxious.

As I past Christina's room, I see her and Will lying on her bed, a tangle of arms and legs and hair. They almost look like the same person. Lynn sleeps on it too, tucked in the left corner, curled into a ball.

On the floor, Tobias looks younger, lips slightly parted and hair sticking out in places. I notice the way his curled eyelashes contrast against his skin, and the way his chest rises and falls slowly. He looks beautiful in an odd way this morning; an odd way, not a weird way. I suppose Tobias will manage to look pretty no matter the situation.

I'm surprised when Alexis shows me a room I haven't seen since I've been here. Arrays of bookshelves line the walls, paint and brushes on a table on the right side, guitars and a drum set in here as well. A grand piano sits in the center, ivory keys dusty, but the black surface looks radiant and brand new.

"What are you going to play me?" I ask her. She shrugs, sliding onto the small bunch, and pats the space next to her.

"Fur ?"

"What?"

Alexis laughs. "It's a song. Like, the most stereotypical piano song ever. I learnt it a few weeks ago."

So she does play it for me. It's something indescribable, a blur of notes and sounds and gorgeous things I didn't know existed. I now know why noise bothers me so much; it doesn't sound like this noise. I'd much rather hear this every single tiring day.

"How old are you?" I manage to breath out, because something like that came with years of practice. I don't even know how to play any instrument, but I do know this isn't something she was just born with.

"Eleven." It amazes me how she doesn't act like she rendered me speechless. Amazing.

And I'm sure that the song isn't even that brilliant. Maybe hundreds of thousands of people know how to play it. But it still sounded wonderful to me.

A few minutes of silence pass, and I miss the sound already. My ears feel muffled now, bare.

She smiles at me. "I can play you another one, if you'd like."

I nod, eager, excited. It feels strange on me.

"Okay," rummaging through a pile on the piano, she picks one out. "It's called-"

"What are you doing?" Tobias doesn't look so beautiful now. He'll have to work harder to compare with Alexis' piano.

But his face softens when he sees me, and his grin doesn't match his former tone.

"Beatrice." He says, differently this time, eyes brightening. My pulse speeds up, like it always does when I'm nervous.

Just a second ago I felt wonder struck. Now I'm scared. Thanks, Tobias.

"I was playing her a song," Alexis shoots him a glare. "Go away."

"You should be sleeping. Or braiding each other's hair. I don't know what girls do." He lets out a yawn. "Just be quiet, okay?"

That earns an eye-roll. "Whatever."

Tobias sighs heavily and walks away, not bothering to shut the door.

"Your hair actually did look nice braided," Alexis tells me. She doesn't seem annoyed anymore. "Can I do it again? I'm not as good as Christina, but it will suffice."

My stomach rumbles, and we both laugh. "I think I'm hungry."

"I think you are."

"We should fix that."

"We should." She raises her eyebrows. "Pancakes?"

"Ew. No." Syrup tastes disgusting.

"Fine. You can eat spinach."

XxX

Tobias finds me after we finish eating our muffins. Muffins, and toast, and cereal, and it did feel good to actually have food in my stomach. I've made a habit of only eating once a day. I had no problem at my old house, but there always seems to be at least ten people at Karen's.

He's showered now, wet hair sticking onto his forehead, stubble gone.

"You were a lovely thing to wake up to this morning." He bites his lip slightly. Oh, god.

"Technically, it was the piano." I tell him, stepping to the side. He does too, and again, and again, so I can't get past. Caleb used to do that.

"Technically, yes, but let's pretend, okay?"

"Okay."

"Will likes that book."

"What?"

Tobias shakes his head. "Never mind. Anyway, I wanted to say good morning to you properly."

I look at him quizzically, backing away because he's getting way too close. I can smell his cologne. I tell myself that's the reason why I feel dizzy.

"And that is?"

Before I can do anything in protest, Tobias seizes my hand and runs his thumb over my knuckles. His fingers are long, and cold against my own, yet my skin still feels on fire, burning every fiber of my existence.

The door opens just as he presses his mouth to my skin. Thank you, door.

"Oh." My mother's voice says. "Sorry."

Dammit, door.

I jump away from him, wrenching my arm back. Tobias furrows his eyebrows, maybe confused as to why I didn't let him kiss me. Idiot.

"Mother," I nod to her, embarrassed, and she smirks ever so softly.

"Beatrice."

I wouldn't have recognized her if it weren't for her voice. The eyes I've grown accustomed to are long gone, dark circles have vanished and a sparkling has replaced them. They look even more like Caleb's now, and it pains me.

Her posture no longer sags, and she just, overall, carries herself differently. I can't help but think its because I've been gone.

This is my first time seeing her, and it's with an attractive boy who touches me way too often.

"Oh," Tobias' face is flushed, and he awkwardly holds out his hand. I expected him to be charming as ever around parents, but I guess I was mistaken. "I'm uh, Tobias."

My mother chuckles. "Nice to meet you, Tobias." She glances at me before turning back to him. "I'm Beatrice's mother."

"The pleasure is all mine." Nope. Charisma still there. "I'll leave you two alone."

Once he leaves, she raises her eyebrows at me. "Oh?"

I only care enough to mutter, "Be quiet."

XxX

We sit in uncomfortable silence, my mother sipping her tea way to loudly, me avoiding her gaze. To make matters worse, Tobias walks past the living room, smiling cheekily at me and blowing a kiss. I hear his laughter echo through the hallway.

"Who's the boy?" She finally asks.

"Tobias." I say.

"Do you like Tobias?

"I don't like Tobias.

"Tobias likes you."

"I know Tobias likes me." I don't, actually, and he doesn't, but this conversation will end sooner if I just agree.

"Tobias kissed your hand."

The scene runs through my mind again. "I know Tobias kissed my hand."

"Tobias is handsome."

"I know Tobias is-" I scowl at her. "Why are you here?"

She pauses before answering, and sets her tea down. "I haven't seen you in weeks. I miss you."

I almost laugh at that. I certainly haven't missed my mother. And considering she brought me here in the first place, I'm sure she wanted to get rid of me.

Natalie sighs. "How are you doing? Made any friends?" She smiles. "Besides Tobias?"

"Alexis."

"That's great. How do you know her?"

"Christina's little sister."

She rolls her eyes. I knew she would. "She's what, ten?"

"Eleven." I correct, getting irritated. I start to stand up, but she places a hand on my arm.

"Stay." She says. "Look, Beatrice, you're staying here to get better."

"And?" I don't need to get better. I know I'm fine. Happy, no, but fine.

I curl my hands into fists, my fingernails digging into my skin and I feel blood.

"Friends help." How she's managing to stay calm, I don't know.

My mother understands a lot of things. She understands that I don't like people; she just doesn't understand why. I don't even know why. And apparently, I need help for that.

I practically hiss out my next words. "The pills are doing that already." But they're not. Those pills don't do anything. People won't either, though.

She purses her lips, much like how she did when I needed to be scolded but we were in public. "I don't think they are," Natalie murmurs. She rubs her temples. "Good thing your first session is next week."

"What session?" I'm never this loud. Only when I'm angry. Furious.

My mother is already standing up, smoothing down her shirt. "Therapy." She says flatly. "Karen will take you."

"What? Why didn't I-"

"Bye, Beatrice."

I don't yell very often. It surprises me when I do. "It's Tris!"

But she's already walking out of the house, leaving me there with red in my vision.

_**how would you guys feel about Tobias' Point of View on the next few chapters? Let me know :)**_

_**Thank you for all the lovely reviews! They honestly make my day. **_

_**Recommendation: I don't know why, but I wanted to tell you guys to check out Valiant, by DaretoDreamBig. It's amazing, so leave a quick little review telling them I sent you! or just review, doesn't matter :)**_

_**Expect a new chapter next week:)**_

_**(me and the smiley faces dammit)**_

_**~Sofie **_


	8. Chapter 8

**_***This chapter is in Tobias' POV. It may seem out of character, but if ou haven't noticed, Tobias is OOC. His view of things will be different then the book. _**

**_Please don't hate me for this damn short chapter. _  
**

**_Seriously though, I apologize. I wanted to get something up. _**

**_I PROMISE A SUPER LONG CHAPTER TOMORROW! _**

**_Quick note: I've gotten many reviews asking about TROBIAS. The time will come. I promise. _**

**_As requested, here's someone's point of view :) _**

**_TOBIAS_**

I feel Lynn's arms wrap around my stomach, her face pressing in between my shoulder blades. Inhaling her perfume, I smile, running my fingers over her hands, admiring her rings and bracelets and scars.

"I don't like Italian." She says. I chuckle lightly, turning around to face her.

"I know that." I say, fixing her hair. "But we're going anyway."

"You suck." I stick my tongue out at her, and she laughs, walking into the kitchen to go find Will.

"God damn, Alexis." Christina sighs, picking at her fingernails. Complaining all day, every day. I study her, wondering how I became friends with Christina in the first place. "How long does your little friend take?"

I smile at that, because I know, I know she's talking about Tris.

Alexis clenches her jaw, narrowing her eyes at her sister. It's a shame she doesn't like me.

"It's been five minutes. Calm down."

"Yeah, miss four hours." Zeke teases, poking her shoulder.

I miss Zeke. He won't admit it, but he sure as hell misses me. Not seeing him every day has been strange, being so used to his grin and his laugh and his chatter. Zeke always filled up the silence. Now that we're not in school anymore, that silence has come again, making it harder to try and get rid of it for good.

Tris descends down the stairs, and I know it's her, because the steps are quiet and careful. She wears different clothes, the black pants too big on her and the shirt sleeves going past her finger tips. Her blonde hair is pulled back, but messy, eyes still tired from sleep.

Beautiful.

Will notices that too.

"You should wear your hair like that more often," he tells her, placing a hand on her shoulder. I frown at him. "Looks nice."

My toes curl as Lynn smiles at them, the rare look if adoration crossing her face. But at a second glance, my lips twitch too, not at them, but at his girlfriend. She seems more upset than I am. I shouldn't take pleasure in her anger, though. I'm jealous too.

The uneasiness doesn't last very long, though, because Tris stands by me, eyes looking over my face then staring at the ground like they didn't. I think of the first time she looked at me, and the feeling I got. Warm, like honey.

"You're coming with us?"

_Of course she's coming with you, idiot._

"Yeah," the corner of her mouth curves. "I kind of have to."

I'll pretend she wanted to come, though.

"You guys ready?" Karen asks, grabbing her purse and keys. She doesn't wear a coat, ever.

"No," Will says, smirking. "We're just standing here because-"

"Shut it, smart ass." I rarely think of Karen as a mother.

Zeke tugs my arm. "So that's Tris."

At first I think he's making fun of me, but then I see the smile on his face, warm and encouraging. I almost regretted telling him about my infatuation with her, that stupid look on his face and his knowing smirks. But I'm glad I did now.

Her small but powerful figure walks in front of us down the pathway, holding Alexis' hand, as if she were her own sister. They both laugh when Alexis trips, her's loud and cheerful, Tris' nothing more than a soft chuckle. I smile; I've found it extremely difficult not to smile around Tris. I'm more excited around her than anyone else.

I can't leave now. I like her too much.

It becomes easier to admit that every day.

**_SUPER SHORT AND TERRIBLE YAY._**

**_but tomorrow, long chapie._**

**_SHIT DIVERGENT IS COMING OUT IN LIKE 13 DAYS OH MY GOSH I CAN'T EVEN. _**

**_I apologize if you didn't enjoy this chapter. Let me know with a review ;) _**

**_50 followers, WOW! Thank you guys so much, ily :p_**

**_Until TOMORROW :):):) _**

**_~Sofie._**


	9. Chapter 9

**_HEY HEY HEY! _**

**_As promised, here's the next chapter :) I hope to make the one after this incredibly longer. Hopefully. _**

**_70 reviews! Amazing! _**

**_Quick Note: Caleb will be explained throughout the story :)_**

**_Disclaimer: I do not own the divergent Trilogy. _**

I let my tense posture sag and a sigh of relief come out of me once I walk through the doors. Karen told me it would be crowded, but apparently that's not the case. I was worried about the number of people occupying the restaurant. My mother never took me out to eat.

I note that Tobias seems glad with this too. He stands next to me, still stiff as a board, but his face relaxes and his eyes close once he catches sight of the few people. Why, I don't know.

"Yes! Table 33 is open!" Tobias' friend, Zeke, I think, shouts. He grabs Tobias' shoulders and shakes him, grinning widely. "It's open! It's open!"

"Should we celebrate with a bottle of champagne?" Lynn sneers, rolling her eyes.

"Lynn!" Will gasps. He puts his head close to mine. I smile a little when I realize I'm okay with that; that I'm comfortable with him.

"We're not suppose to let Karen know." He murmurs, and I shake my head at him. Will laughs then starts walking to what I'm assuming is table 33.

"Do you speak Italian?" Alexis asks me, tugging on my wrist gently. I raise an eyebrow.

"The menus are written in Italian. We'll get you an English one." She explains. I nod.

"I need one too." Christina tells her mother, looking like a five year old.

"Ah," Tobias says. "Still haven't taken a foreign language, Chris?" She gives him a dirty look.

"Hey, you took one your Senior year. I can do that too."

My eyes widen, and I ask Tobias incredulously, "You're not in high school?" I don't know why that's a problem, but it is.

"No," he says, looking amused. "Why?"

I flush scarlet, taking interest in my shoes. Caleb did that with Susan.

"No reason."

"I'm only eighteen, Tris." Tobias wiggles his eyebrows when I look back up, and nudges me. "If that's what you wanted to hear."

Christina scowls at him. "Tobias! Give the girl a break!"

He just laughs.

"You guys are going to get us kicked out," Will says coldly. "Shut up."

Zeke scoffs. "Stop being such a Lynn!"

"Excuse me?" She counters, crossing her arms.

"Hey, that could be like, my thing."

"Stop trying to make fetch happen," Tobias says suddenly, slapping his shoulder. I look at him weird. "It's not going to happen."

I turn to Alexis, who's walking beside me. This restaurant is huge-we still haven't reached our table. "What?"

"Some stupid movie."

"It is not stupid!"

"It's for girls."

"Then be a girl I shall!"

"Zeke's almost as annoying as Tobias." She mumbles.

"I heard that!"

We finally reach infamous table 33, eight seats and a large vase of roses in the center. Alexis drags me over to the left side, sitting in the head chair and pointing to the one next to her. Tobias tries sitting next to me, but Zeke beats him to it, giving him a smug smile. What is that supposed to mean?

"Ciao! Sono Lauren, il server per questa bella serata. farti qualche menu in inglese?"

"Sí." Will surveys the table. "Quattro, per favore."

Lauren, I think, smiles. "Alright." Her voice sounds completely different in English. "Drinks?"

"Coke." Lynn says without a moments of hesitation, not looking at her.

"Water, please." Tobias says more politely.

My mother would have smiled.

"I'll have a Shirley Temple." Alexis says excitedly.

"A what?"

She giggles. "Oh. I'll get you one too, actually."

"What if I don't like it?"

"Don't worry," Zeke smirks, gesturing towards his friend. "Tobias will let you share his."

Karen looks at him disapprovingly.

"What?! Was I supposed to lie?!"

XxX

I eye the drink in front of me suspiciously, not liking the bright color or the smell.

"Drink it," Alexis commands, pushing it more towards me. "It's good."

"Shirley Temples suck." Christina argues, playing with Will's hands.

"Gee. Thanks." She replies flatly.

Christina shrugs.

I turn my head the other direction.

"Dammit, what do I get?"

Tobias sighs. "Zeke, you like everything. Get the whole menu, why not."

"No. I need to get skinnier."

With a worried expression, Tobias nods his head towards Lynn. Zeke's eyes widen.

"Oops. Sorry." He says quietly.

I've always wondered why Lynn needed to gain weight. She seemed to eat enough. Now, she looks at the food around her disgustingly, wrinkling her nose. She looks sick too.

"Lynn?" Tobias says, placing a hand on the back of her neck. "You alright?"

"Fine." She snaps, whacking his hand away. I feel an odd sense off relief.

"What are you getting?"

"Spaghetti."

Tobias doesn't believe her.

"Alright."

Zeke grabs my wrist. I shift uncomfortably.

"Oh my god."

"What?"

"We should totally start a food fight."

"Uh, why?"

"You're saying you don't want to see Tobias covered in chocolate cake?"

I picture that, and smile.

XxX

"hate that place." Will spits, breathing heavily. "So much."

"Just because you didn't like your meal." Alexis notes, annoyed.

"It tasted like Zeke's cooking."

"Hey," Zeke shouts. "This restaurant wasn't that bad."

I block out their conversation, peering at the building across the parking lot. Two cars parked in front, an ugly purple sign in the large window. My stomach twists in knots when I see the words clearly.

_Therapy. _

I'll be in this part of town again, tomorrow.

_**BORING FILLER CHAPTER UGH.**_

_**Zeke is my favorite btws. **_

_**I love him. **_

_**Therapy session next chapter *bites nails nervously* **_

_**So glad you guys are liking this story. Almost at ten chapters :D **_

_**SHEO EXISTS. **_

_**Just saying. Like really. It's happening. For real. **_

_**Review and PM your suggestions, comments, anything. I love hearing from you. **_

_**Until next time- **_

_**~Sofie. **_


	10. Chapter 10

**_Hello! _**

**_Almost 90 reviews? That is so fantastic! I cannot thank you all enough. The honestly make my day. _**

**_I wanted all of you to go check out the amazing fanfiction One Hell of a School Year._**

**_It's high-quality writing with correct grammar and an actual WELL-PLANNED PLOT. One of my absolute favorites! _**

**_On another note, I want to let you all know that most chapters will be around this size. School has gotten quite a bit harder, and I would rather have a new chapter posted once a week then a rather longer one every two months. apologies if shorter chapters aren't your cup of tea. _**

**_Im not that happy with this chapter, but the next one is filled with a bunch of humor, which I enjoy ;) _**

**_Without further ado-_**

"Beatrice?" A voice says, the door opening then closing again.

I don't bother turning around. My eyes stay focused on the walls, a soft, peach color, easy on the eyes and mind.

That is what I need right now; simplicity.

"Beatrice Prior?" She repeats, heels tapping against the wooden floor.

The sound irritates me, and I bite my tongue to keep from saying anything about it.

I haven't had a therapist, but the woman who sits in front of me sure doesn't look like one. Brown hair with brightly colored streaks, dark eyes lined with makeup. She crosses her legs and clasps her hands in her lap after setting down the clipboard.

"Actually, it's Tris." I correct her.

It's taken me a few days to get used to it, and even now, it's tastes weird.

The woman smiles at me, then holds out a tan hand.

"I'm Tori."

I reluctantly take the hand.

"I'm going to ask you a few questions. Is that alright?"

Nodding, I lie, "Yes."

Tori seems to detect this, but keeps her mouth shut.

She preps a paper and pen, causing uneasiness to swirl in my stomach. The thought of having my words documented doesn't settle well.

"Who do you live with?"

Hmm. When I first entered the large room, I assumed Tori knew everything about me, ranging from Caleb to my dislike for noise. Maybe she does, and she just doesn't want to let me know that.

"Christina." I say, running my fingers over the couch. I'd admire the paint on my nails, if it wasn't for the bright blue. Shauna did them yesterday.

"You live with a fifteen year old girl?"

I restrain rolling my eyes.

"No. Her mother and sister live with us as well."

"Your opinion on the three?"

It would be easiest to start with my favorite.

"Alexis is my...friend. She knows how to play the piano."

"How do you feel about that?"

I pause. "I think that makes her very smart."

Practice and patience would have to be put into that. Two qualities I lack.

Tori scribbles something down, and she shields it from view when I try to sneak a peak.

"Would you like to learn how to play an instrument?" She asks.

I haven't thought about it.

"Your mother says you don't have much hobbies."

To my distaste, my throat tightens at mention of her. Karen has come into my room five times to say my mother has called. I didn't care.

"Maybe." Is all I care to reply.

"Christina. Tell me about her."

I don't see any point in this, but I play along, having no doubt Tori will tell my mother if I'm rude. Or Karen. Confusion clouds my mind as I try to figure out who's in change of me.

"She's really pretty." I say honestly, envy running through me. I get rid of it quickly. "But she's nice."

Tori nods her head, indicating me to go on.

The constant flow of teenagers in her house. "Popular."

"Friends over often?"

I nod as fast as I can. This causes Tori to chuckle softly, writing more.

"Have you met them?" She questions. I feel as if this conversation is rather one-sided.

"Yes."

"Do you like them?"

Will is the first to pop up in my head; his hair, his eyes, his scent. Books and candles and rain. Will? I definitely enjoy Will's company.

"Yes." I say again.

Tori looks doubtful of this. "All of them?"

Blue eyes and dark hair. I hesitate before answering her, not wanting to be pestered with questions about him.

"Not so much."

Tori seems to know who I'm talking about, as she grins a little and says, "Tobias."

Tobias.

The first feeling that washes over me is nervousness.

Him, his personality, the way he talks, causes an alarm in my chest. People, overall, make me nervous. The panic he causes is completely normal, but so different compared to other people.

I think of when Tobias touches me. Acid. Fire. I don't know what to make out of those things. I've always associated them with danger; a warning sign, that I shouldn't let him touch me again. Now that I really think about it, I sense a ghost of his skin on mine, and it feels like a sunrise.

Laughing has always been a sound that bothered me; an unnessacary noise. That way Tobias does it, though, I've come to enjoy.

That startled me a bit.

"...Fine."

Tori cocks her head to the side. "That all?"

"Yes."

"I don't believe you."

That's okay. I don't either.

XxX

"Tris!" Alexis shouts, running up to me, her footsteps against the sidewalk echoing.

I stumble back a bit when she crashes into me.

"Hey." I say, smiling a bit.

She grins up at me.

"Oh," she says, letting go of my shoulders and brushing herself off. "Sorry."

"It's fine."

"We're having a horror movie marathon." She states, rocking back and forth on the balls of her feet. Excited.

"Is that so?"

Alexis nods eagerly, motioning me to come inside.

"We ordered pizza too. Come on!"

A laugh escapes me, and I follow her.

Tobias, Zeke, Shauna, Christina, and Will are seated on the floor, eyes trained on the screen. Christina sees me first, nodding in acknowledgement. I wave, feeling awkward, and set my things down on the table.

"Oh, it's you!" Zeke says, snapping his fingers. "Um, um..."

Tobias snickers. "Her name's Piss."

I don't bother restraining my eye roll as I sit next to him.

"Well, Piss, we're watching Momma."

"That's a horror movie?"

Zeke shrugs.

"It's pretty good. And scary." He winks at me. "So you can sit on my lap, if you want."

Tobias scoffs, turning red when I raise my eyebrows at him.

"Thanks." I say to Zeke, holding my hands out in front of me.

"Your loss."

Alexis hands me a slice of pizza.

"I need to take my medicine first." I say quietly, staring at Tobias' hands.

No matter how long I've been staying here, or how long I've been taking the pills, I don't like letting people know.

"That's okay." Will stands up. "I'll get you a glass of water."

I murmur a thank you, purposely avoiding Christina's pity filled eyes, and speed walk to the bathroom.

"Here you go," he sets the drink on the counter, and a hand on my shoulder.

"What's wrong with me?" I ask suddenly, shutting my eyes. Flashes of Caleb.

Before therapy, I didn't know something was wrong with me. I knew that my personality was different from others, but isn't everyone's?

The realization hit me just now. People who aren't bad don't go to therapy for help. They don't need it. They don't need medicine to help them function right either. I need it though. Obviously, there's something wrong.

Will is silent, stroking my hair softly, and I don't care.

His touch is comforting, and for now on, I'll associate him with safety.

"Nothing."

I turn around to face him, looking up at green eyes and soft blond curls. My hands tremble.

"You're different."

I knew that.

"Then something's wrong with me."

He shakes his head. "No. I'm different, too."

"How?"

"That's for another time." He says. I don't press on, knowing that would irritate me.

"Lynn's different. That doesn't mean anything's wrong with us."

I try to believe his words, which is proven difficult.

"What does the medicine do, then?"

"Nothing." He repeats.

"Should I stop taking them?"

"No," he says, smiling wryly. "Let's just humor the people who make you."

I nod and swallow them quickly.

When we re-enter the room, it's pitch black, only the silhouettes of people visible.

Alexis, I know it's her because of the hair, throws a pillow at me.

"My god, Piss, you scared me!"

"I told you you'd be too frightened." Tobias points out.

She sits up straighter. "I'm fine."

Will guides me over to the couch, sitting me between him and Christina.

"This movie is like, hella creepy." She says, clutching my arm.

"Uh, yeah." I respond, trying to shrug her off. It doesn't work. She seems to hold on tighter.

I don't pay attention to the movie. I let my eyes fall on Zeke's hair, and Tobias's grin, a flash in the dark. Focusing on Shauna's laugh and Alexis biting her nails, my mind is far from the television. I never thought I'd find people I could stay with for more than twenty minutes.

But, I suppose now, I have.

**_Therapy party *wooh*_  
**

**_Please tell me your thoughts. I absolutely love hearing them:) _**

**_**And though I haven't gotten any negative comments, which I'm thankful for, I wanted to say you shouldn't leave one on anyone else's story. Constructive critisism is completely fine and should be taken into account. _**

**_But then again, no flames or hurtful things. If you truly do not like the story, just leave. Don't read it.**_**

**_BLOODY HELL DIVERGENT IN LIKE A WEEK MY GOD..._**

**_S.H.E.O.I.S.R.E.A.L. _**

**_goodbye lovelies. _**

**_~Sofie._**


	11. Chapter 11

**I JUST HATE BORING CHAPTERS WBU.**

**But *spoiler* TROBIAS **

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Divergent._**

Tobias walks up to the counter, leaning over it and resting his elbows on the surface.

He smiles at me, biting his lip.

I raise my eyebrows at him. "What are you doing here?"

For once, he hadn't spent the night. Nobody did, and it was nice having time with Alexis. Christina went shopping with her mom.

"What are _you _doing here?" He mimics.

I gesture to my toast, which has seeds in it and tastes weird. "What does it look like, Tobias?"

Staring at me for a little bit, he cocks his head to the side. There's bags under his eyes, taking attention away from their peculiar color.

"Say my name again." He orders. I roll my eyes, turning away and looking at Karen's wine glass collection.

"If this is some lame attempt to flirt with me-"

I'm cut off by his laughter. Heat rushes to my face.

"_Flirt _with you? Oh my god..."

I stand up abruptly and shove my breakfast in the trash. Karen will yell at me later.

"Look, go hang out with Christina and Will or something."

He smirks, looking down at me and blocking the entrance to the hallway.

"Excuse me?" I say. Tobias chuckles again, crossing his arms.

For a moment, I'm distracted by him again, gazing at his features.

Does he just _wake up _like that?

"So, Tris," he leans against the doorframe, looking down at his feet. The style of his hair is different-it's shorter now.

"Yes?" I tap my foot impatiently, trying to convince him I'm bored and not embarrassed on my accusations.

"Did my lame attempts at flirting work?"

When I think of Tobias, I don't focus on the flirting, if that's even what he does. My mind wanders to his laugh, and his smile, and his jokes. The multiple times I've seen him interact with Lynn; although Christina told me they weren't dating, he acts like they are. I suppose I admire that. He protects her, even if he knows she doesn't need it.

All of those things confirm that, whatever he is, I like him. It's easier to admit to myself now, with Tobias in front of me. How I got from despising him to liking him is beyond me.

Though, I'm not quite sure what liking means. Caleb and Susan gave me a little knowledge on it. Stolen glances and quiet smiles that shouldn't mean a lot, but they do. Tobias and I haven't done that yet. At least I don't think.

To be safe, I tell myself I don't like him. Yet.

"Yes." I say quickly. His eyes widen.

And then I scurry out of the room, laughing quietly.

xXx

"How's your therapist?"

I've told Alexis I didn't want to talk about Tori. It's not that Alexis isn't trustworthy; I just don't want to tell anyone. Pity never worked well with me.

She stops me before I scold her. "Look, I just, want to know more about her. She's your friend and I'm your friend."

I don't say anything.

"Maybe...maybe she can come over for dinner, or something?"

I'm too exhausted to deal with her. Anyone. "Sure. Whatever."

"Someone's in a shitty mood." She grumbles.

I try lightening the mood. "Shitty? Aren't you like, eight?"

"More or less. Let's do something."

"Piano?"

She makes a face. "No. I think my fingers are going to fall off if I play one more song."

Christina comes barreling through the door, holding small pieces of paper.

"Piss!" She says breathlessly, grinning widely. She almost looks like the Cheshire Cat in the book Alexis read to me. "Which one do you like?"

I stand up slowly and examine the sheets. Shades of yellow and hues of purple and different colors.

"What are these for?" I ask. "We're painting your room."

The blankness of my room was the thing I liked most about it. I frown.

"I don't want to paint my room." I say firmly, walking back to Alexis' bed.

Christina shakes her head, still smiling. "Too bad. I'm spoiling you today."

"When are you going to spoil _me_?" Alexis asks.

"Christina, thank you, but I don't need anything."

"But Zeke and Will are already out buying the paint. Hurry, pick one!"

My mother never let me in Caleb's room. She never mentioned it, so I never asked, but it always remained locked. I don't know whether I wanted to go in or not. Part of me knew I wouldn't be able to handle it, the other said that seeing his possessions would help me.

But I caught a glimpse of the blue walls once. It didn't hurt my eyes like the sky or the ocean. I point to the one that looks the most like that. A dark yet soft color. Tori said I needed to be more accepting of Caleb's absence. I suppose having his favorite color in my room counts.

"That's pretty." Christina says thoughtfully. I swallow the lump in my throat and nod. "Okay, awesome. You can spend the night with me while the paint dries. We're getting you a new bed spread, too."

"Can it be gray?" I ask.

She sighs. "Fine. Lemme go text them."

Alexis smiles at me once she leaves. "I think it's nice that they're doing this."She says.

I look at the design next to her mirror. Eleven yellow flowers, painted over the red.

"What are those?"

"Every year I live should be treasured. So, on my birthday, I get a new one painted."

I'm at a loss for words. I didn't know children could be so wise.

Hopefully, I ask, "Can I get something like that?"

Alexis shrugs. "Sure. But you should get something that means a lot to you."

_What means a lot to me?_

The floor vibrates. "Shit!" Tobias yells.

We laugh.

Alexis takes my hand and leads me to her sister's room.

"Have a nice trip, Tobias?" She asks, kicking his side. He glares at her and stands up.

"How much do you weigh?"

"I don't know." She says.

"But you do know I can probably throw you, correct?"

Alexis rolls her eyes. "You can throw anyone, Mister macho man."

"Exactly. So I suggest you don't make fun of me again, Missy May." He deadpans. Alexis looks bored.

I hear the front door open.

"And, WE ARRIVE!"

"Oh my god, _be quiet!_" Will hisses. "Lynn's sleeping."

"Piss, we got your paint!" Zeke shouts again.

Heavy footsteps pound on the stairs.

"And we only bought two cans." Will adds once they're in the room.

Christina groans. "That's not enough, idiot."

"Hello to you too, babe." He says sweetly, kissing her forehead. I watch them closely, even though it feels wrong.

"And we would have gotten more," Will tells me. "If it wasn't for this dumb ass."

Zeke holds his arms up in defense. "I did not know I would get us kicked out!"

"Yes, because vandalizing the store is completely okay."

"I simply wanted to express myself."

"Whatever. Tobias, we're starting in twenty minutes."

I have trouble concealing my laughter. I imagine Tobias with a paint brush, staring intently at a canvas. Ridiculous.

"You paint?" I ask, grinning.

"Actually, yes. And I'm painting your room. You're welcome, by the way."

"I never asked you to." I remind him.

He shrugs. "I want to." He smiles. "Would you like in big, bold letters Tobias Eaton Was Here?"

Heat rushes to my face. "But then that would indicate you were in my bedroom."

_Doing things. _

I shudder.

Zeke throws his hands in the air. "That's the _point!"_

**_I. SAW. DIVERGENT! _**

**_Oh my god, it was amazing! Theo was the best Four, and Shai totally did justice for Tris. _**

**_I THINK IM GOING TO CRY IF THEY DONT START DATING SOON. _**

**_Anyway, if you haven't seen it, go! _**

**_Im thinking of posting another story...review some ideas...*hint hint*_**

**_TOMORROW IS MONDAY. _**

**_Ew. School. Gross. People. Ugh. _**

**_~Sofie._**


	12. Chapter 12

_**Aye! Apologies for not updating sooner; this chapter isn't even that long. It took me quite a while to write it, and when I did, I probably re-wrote it five times.**_

_**AND DAMN, 110 REVIEWS! MY GOD! THANK YOU! I really appreciate every one. Love you guys :)**_

_**I really hope this chapter clears some stuff up for you guys. More details about Caleb are coming. Enjoy! **_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Divergent. **_

"Are you picking me up?" I clutch at his arm desperately, like if I hold on tight enough, I won't have to go in.

Tobias looks down at me, his brow puckered like he's concerned. Maybe he is; I'm sure I don't look to good. My stomach twists when I catch sight of Tori, standing outside the building, arms crossed.

"Yeah," he says. Slowly, he reaches for a strand of my hair, tucking it behind my ear.

"I'll see you soon."

I only nod in response. He sighs and gets back into his truck-a vibrant shade of orange. He seems to hate it just as much as I do.

Tori's dark eyes calculate my steps as I make my way over to her. I feel intimidated; not by her, but by the questions she's going to ask me.

"Hello, Tris." She sets a hand on my shoulder, her purple nails squeezing.

Automatically, she snatches the sunglasses from my face, pursing her lips. "The sun isn't out."

"_Really?_" The worst of me comes out when I'm with her. "I didn't notice."

Tori just shakes her head in disappointment. I feel a bit guilty, but the feeling washes away once she starts leading me down the hall.

"Hey," I say, tugging at her coat. She doesn't turn around, but I know she's glaring at me.

"We passed room six."

"Really?" She mocks. I frown, the tips of my eyelashes touching my brows. "I didn't notice."

Tori walks all the way to the back, stopping at the door that's marked with a big black 12. There's no other rooms around it.

"Why are we here?"

"It's a...different sort of room." She says. My heart hammers in my chest so loudly that I don't hear anything other than its beat for a moment.

When the door opens, the first thing I see are the trees. They aren't in the room, but outside, the big window revealing the scenery. Flowers with a subtle pink color lie there, too, mixing in with other green things. I hear birds chirping. The entire space is massive, much larger than any of the other therapy rooms. Only two chairs occupy the room, both facing each other in the center of the room. Blank white walls surround us, muffling the sounds of the other kids in the building. In room six, I could hear them; one started crying.

"This is amazing." I say. Tori, who I almost forgot was here, starts towards the chairs.

"I know. It promotes relaxation and gives off a calming effect. I thought it would be...appropriate for today."

My mouth feels dry.

But I am relieved when Tori doesn't pull out a clipboard. She simply sits down, motioning for me to join her.

"What've you doing lately, Tris?" She asks warmly, smiling a little. I look at her skeptically; she's never this nice, and she wasn't like this a minute ago.

"Uh...I went shopping with Christina." I point to my gray shorts, who's edges are already fraying. Or maybe they were already like that.

"Oh? Is that all you got?"

"She bought me a few shirts."

"She?" Tori says. "You didn't buy them?"

"...No."

She sighs deeply. "I think you should get a job."

"Why?"

"So you can make your own money. Wouldn't you be proud of yourself?"

I never liked relying on people for things. This is one of the rare moments I decide Tori is right. "Okay."

A silence settles over us.

"Tris..."

It takes me a moment to fit the puzzle pieces together; a relaxing, safe room, the unusual kindness she's showing, no clipboard... She wants to _talk._

Not about silly things, like what I did the other day, or why Tobias 'accidentally' touched my waist when he came to pick me up last week.

My lip starts bleeding from biting too hard as I make a realization.

Caleb.

Tori must see the way I freeze, because she sits up straighter, setting her hands on my knees. The things around me become blurry; foggy, confused.

Caleb Caleb _Caleb._

Tori says something that has to do with breathing. I don't catch it, my vision clouding with small dots that resemble stars.

_Gunshots. _

I finally shut my eyes, cover my ears, block out the world. She wants to talk. I haven't _talked_ in three years. What does talking do? It doesn't make it better; it doesn't erase the hurt. I already know what happened that night, and I don't need a reminder.

_A scream. _

I suck in a sharp breath. The images fade out slowly, the dizziness going away, the ache that traveled to my chest disappearing. When I look up, Tori is watching me with wide, worried eyes, her fingers twitching. I slump back into my chair, my lungs burning.

Caleb.

One more word eventually invades my mind, poking at my weak spots, haunting my thoughts. So painful I haven't had the strength to admit it.

_Gone._

_**I have has a case of writer's block lately, so please review any suggestions you have in mind!**_

_***Important Note: I am NOT abandoning this story! I'm sorry I haven't been updating, but they will take longer, seeing as my schedulis has been very hectic. I assure you that I update as often as I can. Kisses! **_

_**-x-SHEO-x- **_

_**Like you don't even understand omfg. **_

_**Not to spoil anything, but major Will/Tris friendship next chapter. And *coughTROBIAScough* **_

_**I hope you all enjoyed spring break if you've had it! **_

_**Until next time. **_

_**~Sofie. **_


End file.
